Saying NO (confessions of a pushover)

Surprise Surprise, I am one of those people who have such an issue with saying NO.

To some I'm sure this may come as a surprise because I have no problems saying no to strangers or speaking my mind to friends if for example I get shoved by someone on the subway. But when it comes to family, coworkers and sometimes friends, I have this issue with saying no when they ask me to do something.

I do enjoy being perceived as the 'nice girl' and I really do have good intentions with those I feel are important to me but I also am realizing that in order to attain self confidence, maintain my physical and mental health, and be well respected, I need to start standing up for myself. I need to let people know how to treat me rather than be so worried about how I come across. As my friends are starting families, I'm realizing I need to change this well before I start a family of my own! I need to be a good role model and achieve the confidence and self esteem I am clearly lacking before I pass my anxiety on - as I feel may have been passed on to me.

I know I need to start being more assertive and I know I should be looking after myself more without worrying about what people will think of me. I know this can be done in an effective manner. I just have to learn and eventually I will earn the respect I deserve among work colleagues, family and friends. I know my family and friends love me but I also know I panic too often and it does have to be toned down.

My gosh I'm sure I'm annoying. I cannot be taken seriously however if I'm constantly being a pushover.